Saturday, August 25, 2012

PC Hits the Boondocks

 Water Closet "WC" in the Rocky Mountains


OMG,  Political Correctness "PC" in the Rockies too!

WARNING: A true potty story ahead

Sadly, the liberal contagion of political correctness infecting every corner of our United States has now come to the remotest of the boondocks, sticks, hinterlands.

I was recently hiking in a remote part of the Rockies and came upon a welcome site, an indoor potty.  'Doing your business' outside loses its magic very quickly and finding a structure with a roof over your head in the wilds is a luxury of sorts.

As I gleefully approached the wc, I was flummoxed at the head scratching sign on the entrance to the potty: Biological Conversion System, Please No Trash!  Is this a potty or a laboratory? After opening the door, I found our that in fact it was a potty, smelled like a potty but was publicly sanitized by a rather ridiculous entry name, Biological Conversion System.

This wc ceased being a bathroom in my mind but a "biological conversion system."  So, I bought into the new lexicon and released my "biology" into the descending sphere of darkness and then pondered on the potty how far adrift we have become in sterilizing innocent words that used to mean something into language nonsense whose intent is in being safe instead of being real.  And for what?  Made me think of the 'bastardization' of other words or phrases in our vocab into creatures of political glossary re-engineering.  Here are some of those words and phrases from the simple past and now with their modern foggy obfuscations and plunderings:

FAT   now,  obese
GARBAGE MAN  now,  sanitary engineer
GHETTO  now,  economically disadvantaged area
ILLEGAL ALIENS now,  undocumented immigrants
JUNGLE now,  rainforest
HEAT WAVE now,  global warming
SECRETARY now,  administrative assistant
TRAILER PARK  now,  mobile home community
WHITE TRASH, still the same but God forbid if you use the N word
FOUNDING FATHERS,  now,  the founders
BUM, now,  homeless person
BROKEN HOME, now,  dysfunctional family
MERRY CHRISTMAS, now,  Happy Holidays
CHRISTMAS TREE, now, holiday tree
BC (BEFORE CHRIST) and AD (ANNO DOMINI), now, before common and common areas
EASTER EGGS, now, spring spheres

and the number 1 and 2 candidates for political antiseptic silliness are:

LESBIANS, HOMOSEXUALS AND QUEERS, now,  gay (a tragic takeover of such a fine word. When is the last time you heard, I had a gay time?)
BLACKS, now,  African Americans (I'm white but the politicos don't label me an Irish American)

So, after digesting that strange interlude in the biological conversion system structure, I continued on my trail journey and was enlightended by the reality that my hike became so much more complicated and correct than just walking on a path to somewhere but a non-specifically ambulatory exercise to mitigate individual obesity on governmental wildlands.





  

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